Your Love and Your Life

You wish things had ended differently. That she would have done more, that you could have done less. You just want things to have been different. 

You wouldn’t have said what you had said if you knew how things were going to go. Sure, you felt it, and she eventually said it back, but it wasn’t the same after that. 

To you, the words “I love You,” might as well be a knife to thé throat of your relationships. 

You kill all the beautiful things in your life and are left lost with the remains that no amount of resuscitation can breathe new life into. 

Maybe it’s better that way. 

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Fighting Words

Memories are the silent killer, the ones that wrap around your head and whisper into your ear that you could have done everything to change the thing you fear the most. 

Or worse, the ones that sweetly sing that song of regret where if you had changed one thing, Made one phone call, sent one text, wrote one word, everything would have changed.  

How were you supposed to know all that would change everything? How were you supposed to know what to do?

You were just a kid, who lost their entire childhood. 

But now you can fight with your quiet little voice. 

You can’t gain back what you’ve lost, but you can still smile. 

Decisions, Decisions

Your head is spinning. You can’t believe how weak and powerless you feel over one simple bit of information. How strong you felt when you first started and now you have never felt so defeated. 

All it takes is one word, one quick action to make everything go from amazing to complete disaster. One moment in time where you makes a decision that can have repercussions for years and years to come. 

In this moment: Will you stay, or will you go?

Failure is Not an Option! 

Failure is not an option. 

You tell yourself this over and over again,

Until it becomes a permanent mantra.

You have to finish this project,

Before the month rolls over to a new one.

You have already reached close enough,

To taste the sweet success,

Of the winner’s circle. 

But you have your own goals. 

100K or Bust!

Where Have You Gone?

Now that she has fully disappeared, the world has changed. The sky is darker, more stormy, more clouds and less blue. The air itself is electrified with torment, and when the chilled wind blows all you hear is her voice, beckoning you back to the better days. 

Warmer days. 

You miss the spring and her cute sister, Summer. 

Houdini 

She’s slowly disappearing. 

The artist, the creative, 

The crazy. 

She is being replaced.

The analytical, the theorist,

The Calm under all circumstances. 

So you paint your skin with permanent ink,

And pierce your skin with loud colored metals,

And hope you recognize yourself in the mirror,

Through the work professional attire,

And the fake smiles. 

You try to keep yourself from disappearing. 

Is it working?

Fight Club

You look for an exit, whether through the trees or the sea of people, or even from the prison of your body. 

You can’t find one, so you choose to fight. Them, the situation, everything you hate, and even yourself. 

You hope you’re dreaming, that you’ll wake up in your bed, safe and sound. 

But you know you aren’t. 

Thanksgiving is always a battlefield.